030: Stop Creating Problems (Where there none)

In Podcast by Robert KandellLeave a Comment

Share Share on FacebookPin on PinterestShare on LinkedInTweet about this on TwitterEmail this to someone

There was an epic fire in my new home of Calabasas, California on Saturday. We could see huge billowing smoke, fire helicopers, planes, fire-trucks over the ridge from our home. I was home cooking dinner waiting for Morgan and the kids to come home.

When they come in the front door, the two kiddos (aged 5 & 7) are screaming with fear, their insides clenched, tears flowing down their red cheeks, and no amount of soft words could unclench their fear. They saw their own death and felt powerless to the fire and its destructive nature.

I sat with them and used a calming process i had once learned:
Me: “Are we in any danger right now?”
Little one: “Nooooo”
Me: “Do you think we’ll be in danger in the next hour?”
Little one: “No….”
Me: “then we’re really not in danger right?”
Me: “YESSS!!!!!”

Okay, well, they calmed down after another hour or so. I realized that as kids, we can not use our rational minds to eliminate paralyzing fear when we perceive if an actual problem exists or not. You’d think as adults, we’d get better at it.

Most aren’t. As my College professor once told me, “Don’t create a problem when there are no problems”.

Come join us for the discussion and learn some tips on how to harnass your fear and stay sane in insane situations.