TL 055 | Woman’s Moon Cycle

055: The Mystery of a Woman’s Biology with Sheleana Aiyana

TL 055 | Woman’s Moon Cycle

 

A woman’s moon cycle is a mystery and there’s a sphere that lives around it for both men and women. Changing your diet and your workload actually changes this cycle. Sheleana, creator of Rising Woman, a platform centered around women’s health, relationships, self-care, and beauty, is passionate about women’s cycle, having done a lot of studies on women over the years. She shares that a woman’s cycle is a rite of passage into womanhood. Once we understand how our cycles work, we get to work with it and it gets to become an empowering tool rather than something that we’re at the whim of and we’re a victim to the emotional ups and downs of.

Thank you to all my listeners who download the show. We’ve done over 5,000 downloads, which compared to others, is nothing but compared to me, it’s huge, it’s everything, and I’m grateful for that. Looking forward to a new website, new expansion, more podcast, spreading the word of Tuff Love, spreading the word of having what you want in this life. The person with a foot on the brake is you, spreading that word through communication and honesty and real. You can have your life exactly the way you want it, so thank you.

Our guest star in this episode is my friend Selena from Vancouver. She is simply amazing. We talk about the topic of a woman’s cycle, her moon cycle, her biology and this mystery and the sphere that lives around it for both men and women and how you can put more attention on it to be a better friend and to be nicer to yourself. We then go across the pond to talk to Selena about her cycle and how she changed her diet and changed her workload and how this is affecting her cycle and as her daughter, which is her twelfth birthday, how that’s affecting things as well. It’s a pretty amazing show. For more shows, please visit us at TuffLove.Live.

Listen to the podcast here:

The Mystery of a Woman’s Biology with Sheleana Aiyana

I am happy to have a favorite person on the line. Her name is Selena. She’s been a friend of mine. When we first met around 2011, she came in and was visiting and passing through mutual friends. The only way I can describe her is impressive. She and her partner were impressive people. Selena herself had strength and power and I was immediately drawn to that. It didn’t quite work out between us and them working for the business, but it left a lasting impression of someone who was fascinating, interesting, powerful, and in my opinion, brilliant. We reconnected this year and she came to Venice a couple months ago. We had a fun lunch and I invited her to be on the show. I am excited to have her talking about the topic of women’s biology. How’s it going?

Good. Other than my major technical crash that prevented us from being on video, we’re good.

Mercury retrograde, end of the year, it happens. I’m sure your energy is going to push out and be powerful.

Thanks. It’s good to be here and glad to have a little chat with you. Thanks to everybody.

You and I are going to talk about the topic. You can take it, you can run with it, but the goal is to make you a star, which you already are, but just to bring you out. Then we’re going to do coaching with my friend Selena, and we’ll improvise and see how that goes.

I can do a little intro and then I’m happy to answer questions, especially it’s a good opportunity when I have a male participant such as yourself. It’s good idea to answer any questions that you may have as a man. I’m not sure how well-versed you are in this area.

I’m well-versed, but I also have this little fear in the back of my head that I’m not well-versed. I know a lot, and yet there’s so much more to know. We’ll see how it goes. Introduce yourself. Who are you? Tell us a little history and why did you pick this topic. What do you love about this topic?

My name is Selena. I’m a writer, I’m an online entrepreneur, and I run a series of online businesses. My previous company was called Young and Raw. Young and Raw was a health and wellness, plant-based nutrition site. We had an iPhone app in the iTunes store and fun cleanses and things like that. I’ve always been passionate about sharing what I love online through a platform. I’ve developed a little bit of a following online where people follow me and what I’m up to and that changes often. They are all on the edge of their seats on what I’m going to create this time and honestly, so am I, because it’s always changing. I find that I’ve always been drawn to the feminine art in some way. Anything that’s about health and wellness and healing and women’s empowerment, I’m drawn to.

I’m building a business called RisingWoman.com. I took on a partner as well and her name is Heather, and we’re going to be building that together. That’s a platform for women centered around women’s health, relationships, self-care, beauty, and all of that stuff. Then I’m going to be launching a new channel with my partner Ben, and that’s going to be called Love and Truth. In general, I’m passionate about this topic because I’ve done a lot of studying of women over the years. I’m a birth doula as well. For those of you who don’t know what a birth doula is, we work alongside midwives, but we are there for the woman’s emotional support and for herself care and for her mental and emotional and spiritual well-being. We’re not doctors or medical professionals. I usually say to people, while everyone else is looking at her vagina, I’m looking at her eyes. That’s the role of the Doula.

I’ve been in that work for awhile, and what I’ve come to learn over many years is that a woman’s moon cycle or her period or her menstrual cycle, that’s a rite of passage. It’s an initiation into womanhood. Like in birth, these are two things that are in many ways considered to make women weak. They are two things that are often kept in the dark. Birth is usually kept behind hospital doors and it’s hush-hush, and nobody wants to talk about the birthday. All they want to know is, “Do you have a healthy baby?” They say things like, “It’s a healthy baby.” That’s all that matters and completely disregarding the woman’s birth experience, even though that’s one of the most pivotal experiences in her entire life, if not the most.

It’s similar in the realms of menstruation. A woman’s first moon cycle is her rites of passage into womanhood. In many cultures, they are the rites of passage events that occur for a young woman to enter into womanhood. In our culture, what we see in the media and in our culture is different. Women are not told much about it. It’s considered something that needs to be kept away. We watch tampon commercials that about the worst thing ever could be that somebody would see blood coming through your pants, as if it’s this awful shameful thing. We’re seeing this shift into this hyper masculinization of women where instead of that, because that’s not acceptable anymore, we’re having these women push themselves really hard during their periods instead. We see these women who are ripped and they’re just giving it and they’re doing all of these extensive activities and they’re dripping sweat and they’re like, “Nothing’s going to stop me now.”

None of that is conducive to a woman honoring herself and her cycle and acknowledging that during that time, something is going on in her body and it doesn’t need to be ignored and we don’t have put ourselves up and take Advil and pretend that everything is normal because it’s a very significant time. I’m passionate about helping women get in tune with their bodies and understand how their cycle can help them experience more pleasure in the world that they’re not stuck doing things that they don’t want to do, because if you look at the way that a woman is from week to week, it’s very different. If she’s in tune with her body, she will notice that every week she feels differently. She may schedule a party and then two weeks later the party comes up and she’s like, “Why did I schedule this party? All I want to do is stay home. I want to be cozy and my blanket and watch a movie. I don’t feel like socializing, but two weeks ago I was feeling this party.”

That isn’t a coincidence. That’s the woman in her cycle. That’s the flow, that’s the natural rise and fall. Once we understand how our cycles work, we get to work with our cycle and it gets to become something that’s like an empowering tool rather than something that we’re at the whim of and we’re a victim to the rises and falls and the emotional ups and downs and the differences and changes in our body. I’ll elaborate on that a little more unless you have any questions.

My version of it, I grew up in the ‘70s and the ‘80s, and that was such a feminine thing. Women didn’t talk about, mothers didn’t talk about it. You started to talk about school. For guys, there was an inordinate amount of fear around a woman’s cycle. For two to three days, your life was in danger. You have to provide chocolate. You have to be soft. We felt like we were feared animals being chased and hunted during that time, and it’s ridiculous now as an adult and getting more educated. It’s actually the whole cycle is a magical time. Thank you for doing the work to educate and to bring this out in the world because it’s important for both men and women who want to know this is a totally normal, human, beautiful life experience and for us to pull the shame out of it will enhance a lot of lives.

It’s interesting that you say that because it’s true. The work that I do and just raising awareness, I’m definitely not even one of the front liners. I credit my teachers for that. The truth is that there’s a big gap between our understanding of these things and then the reality. Men’s involvement too is something that I like to talk about, especially with men, because you guys sometimes don’t realize how significant you are in these experiences, in the birth room, in pregnancy, and during moon cycle. Men have a significant role, and part of that role is in changing the culture for all of us. It’s important that we realize these significant events represent life, and we’re all creating life, men and women together. It’s something that we need to all educate ourselves on and learn about.

Men crate rites of passages for themselves. You look at places in Africa and they have these young thirteen-year-old boys jumping off roofs or doing a Bogo plant. There are all sorts of different ways for men to experience rites of passage, but women, we come with those experiences built in, and that’s something that we should be paying attention to. Rites of passage experiences have been taken away for all of us. It’s a big issue, but there are some things we can do about it.

There are two specific things I want to break down. The first is I saw this Facebook video that broke down the different days of the month and what happened. That was valuable to me because I’ve always known it, but it defined it. Morgan and I, we have to be careful around pregnancy for certain days of the month and pay a lot of attention to that. The other parts I don’t worry about it. If you could break down the month cycle, that’d be great. The second thing is on the flip side, if you have three or four tips, specific things men could do to be an ally to women around this, that’d be helpful.

I’ll do this in two phases because that, to me, it’s pretty important. First of all, I’ll break it down for you. We have week one, two, three, and four. A lot of times, the architects are like, “The maid is the virgin, which is the week after bleeding, when you consider everything is fresh, you’ve been cleansed, you’re starting over. Then there’s mother, then there’s enchantress, then there’s chrome. Some people call it, “Wise woman.” If we’re looking at it from more of a matter of fact perspective, we’re not looking at it from an architectural perspective, your menstrual cycle starts on day one, and that’s the day that you started bleeding. The average cycle is 29 to 32 days. I know some women are going to say, “Mine is 40 days,” or “Mine doesn’t even come every month.”

That’s true. There are a lot of irregularities and differences, and some of those are because there’s a medical issue or there’s something going on or you’re stressed, and some women have different cycles. Some women have longer cycles. That’s okay, that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong, but traditionally, the way that the moon cycle and the women’s menstrual cycle is linked is about 29 and a half days. There are a lot of women who will experience a 29 and a half day or 30-day cycle. How it works is if you imagine you look at a stock chart and you see the lines that are rising and falling.

A woman on her menstrual cycle is the line is at the bottom. How it works is as the days go by, it rises and then it falls again. It shouldn’t be quite like a roller coaster, like a big dip, but it starts at the bottom and then it rises, it rises, and it keeps rising. Then it evens out for a little bit, and then it starts to fall down back to the bottom. That’s day one. That’s the day that you start bleeding. How it’s going is your hormones are at their very lowest when you start to bleed, for ladies. For men, when your woman says, “I’m in love,” her hormones are at their lowest. Then as the days go by, they start to rise and rise, which is why by about week two and a half to three weeks, when she’s getting into that and enchantress space and her ovulation, what happens is the hormones are very high. She’s feeling playful, she’s feeling social, she feeling empowered, she’s feeling strong, she’s got more testosterone, she’s got more everything.

As they start to fall right before the moon cycle again, everything’s falling again. That’s when fatigue and irritability and maybe some sadness and, “You need more sleep,” and things like that. Week by week, how it works is the first week you’re bleeding, then that’s the time where you’re very inward. Some people call it the menstrual cycles, the chrome phase, where it’s all about going in and cleansing and letting go of anything from the month that needs to let go of and starting anew. During the moon time, you don’t want to be doing any vigorous activity. You could still do yoga or go for a run or whatever, but you want to be gentle with your body. Eating lots of good food, getting lots of rest, just giving yourself that time.

As the next week goes on, now you’re in your maiden phase and you’ve got a little bit more energy and you’re starting to feel fresh and new and you’re ready to take on the world, then you go into the next phase where you’re starting to prepare for ovulation, and every woman is different. Some women, day eight to eighteen, some can ovulate on day twelve, some women on day seventeen. There are ways that you can figure when you’re ovulating, but generally it’s around day fourteen to eighteen for a lot of women. Then you go into this like this enchantress phase where you’re magnetic and Alyssa Vitti talks about this where it’s a good time for you to ask for a raise or go in to do something that requires you to be communicating with a lot of people and negotiating and being diplomatic and things like that.

TL 055 | Woman’s Moon Cycle

Woman’s Moon Cycle: If she’s in tune with her body, she will notice that every week she feels differently.

Then we go back into the crone, where we’re bleeding again. Every single month, we’re going through these wild ups and downs. For some women, it’s very gentle and the changes are not quite as intense, and then for some women it’s intense. Oftentimes, that’s significant about hormonal imbalance, which I know so much about because I’ve been there over and over again and done a lot of healing in that realm, but that’s how it works. Once you understand it, once you start charting your cycle, then you can start to schedule things around how your energy will be and what your mood will be. That way you’re not at the whim of it, you’re actually in control. You can schedule meetings for that week of ovulation where you know you’re going to be on fire and super social. When you know that you’re going to be in that third week of your cycle or that fourth week of your cycle where you’re feeling tired and low and you don’t want to do much, you can no to things, and you can postpone them until a time that suits your cycle. Not all the time you can do that, but for many things you can. The things that you have control over and in terms of gatherings and stuff like that. Does that make sense?

How can a man be an ally to women at this place? Give me top three tips.

I’ll give you some examples in terms of how it works with my partner. For me, one of the things is that my partner knows my cycle. Every year he buys this moon calendar for me that has all of the moon phases and every time I get my moon, then I color in the moon for all the days that I bleed. It’s not my responsibility to know when I’m going to be ovulating, he knows. Sometimes he knows my cycle better than I do. It’s my responsibility to tell him what I need during those times, if I’m feeling like I need more gentleness or if I need more fire, but he also pays attention to that. Remembering that it is a two-way street. One of the most effective forms of birth control is to know your woman’s cycle, so that’s one way you can contribute and to understand. That’s the biggest thing. There’s not a whole lot of tips. Women need to learn how to ask for what they want and men need to learn how to show up and be present and pay attention to her cycle as well, because that’s how you’re going to either plan a baby or prevent a baby for the most part.

That’s the general foundation on how to have a healthy relationship, is for women to speak their mind and men to listen. This is another example of it, but to me, it’s pulling the mystery out of it. Instead of this being something that you can’t talk about overtly, it’d be something you really talk about because to know this information and to know the ins and outs of it and to learn how to relate to dance with it is such an empowering thing that most men do not do.

Men are afraid of it and they don’t understand it. The men that I have been with, fortunately, have understood that the moon cycle has been great to me. I also show that. When I get my moon, I put red sheets on the bed and sometimes I wear all red and I will celebrate it. Even though I have very painful moon cycles, I still honor it as an important time and I don’t hide it. I will talk about my moon cycle to anyone who asks, because it’s not something that there needs to be any shame or anything around. It’s such a natural part of life. It is life. Taking the mystery out is a good thing, and also remembering that the more that we honor these events and practice self-care, the easier all of our lives will be because a lot of times when women are experiencing intense PMS or their cycles are hard to handle, sometimes because they’re actually working against their cycle. They’re trying to push themselves in the direction that their bodies don’t want to go. That’s a whole other topic, but it’s something to pay attention to as well.

Thank you so much. It’s really informative and it’s going to help and free a lot of people around this topic.

Live Coaching 

Let’s bring Selena on. Hi Selena, how are you doing?

I’m actually down these days. I’m reflecting a lot and I have not a lot of physical energy. I’m okay with it, though.

What can we do? How can we make this time most valuable? How can we add to your life?

The two of us have been talking about working with each other anyways, but then I saw your guest. I’ve been worried a little bit above my cycle lately. For the last two years it’s been a nightmare. My work has been more intense. At the moment, my cycle is very short. It’s just 24 days, something like that regularly. It’s short, it’s always like that. I don’t know if that’s okay, or a bit too short, and I’m believing very strongly. I have more pain, and I was worried that after a long period of not going to any doctor, I went to see a gynecologist. She said everything was more or less okay, that I was just bleeding a lot and that wasn’t healthy, but no bigger issues. I know that there is some energetic imbalance. I just feel it. I don’t have that sense that I’m completely healthy at the moment.

The question of energy is lower, your cycles are shorter at 24 days, there’s heavy bleeding, and they’re painful. Are those the symptoms?

The first two days have been painful and that’s okay, but also I have a lot more PMS. I never had that. I haven’t gotten enough tension in my body before, and I have a lot of tension in my body in general.

Let’s talk about that. First of all, I’m not a doctor or a naturopath or anything, but I’ve done this work with myself and so I’ll talk a little bit about the emotional components of it and then I can make a few suggestions for you for people to talk to you about the other stuff, but these intense PMS as well. What I’ve known about that is like when you look at the menstrual cycle, if you look at your hormones, you can go and get a hormone panel done where there are eleven vials throughout the month and you spit on them and you send them in. They can see exactly what’s going on with the rising and falling of all of your hormones throughout the month. In my case, what was happening was around day seventeen, things were crashing. Instead of a gentle fall, it was a crash down a roller coaster. I’d be interested for you to go and get your hormones checked and find out what’s going on, but aside from that, on the emotional level, how much do you pay attention to your cycle day by day? Do you track your cycle? Do you do any reading around your cycle? Do you do any self-care practices before and after?

I do that a lot more. I do have awareness where I’m at. I know when I’m ovulating. I see it and I know it from how I feel, but I also can see it. The last two years I didn’t track it very well, but I do know where I’m at in my cycle. In terms of rituals, I used to take, if possible, half a day off or maybe sometimes a day off when I start bleeding, and like that time by myself. I haven’t been doing that for a year or two or more now.

It’s nice to be able to do that, to schedule time for yourself. There are other things like scheduling time for more sleep. If you’re feeling tired, maybe you have something with your adrenals going on, too. We all have adrenal fatigue these days. It’s the hot new thing. You might want to schedule more time for sleep. There is something that works for me, which I’ll tell you about and you can go and research it on your own, ashwandaj.

It’s an herb. It’s an adaptogen and it can help your hormones naturally balance out. That was a miracle herb for me. It really helped. You have to be consistent with it though. Some herbs require you to be consistent for six months before you see a change. I had awful PMS to where I was almost nonfunctional, and within three to six months, that completely shifted. I love using that herb, but every woman is different, so you want to check in with a naturopath about that and see if that would work for you. There are herbs out there that can help your hormones naturally come back into balance. Then another thing, too, is how much fat are you eating. Are you eating a lot of fat?

I’ve changed that. I used to be on a very low-fat diet and then my boyfriend does Bulletproof. That has a lot more fat and now I’m eating a lot more fat.

How long has it been since you started eating from low-fat the high-fat?

More than a year.

How long were you low-fat for?

About a year, maybe more, but at least half a year. It was super low. I tried eating raw vegan and ate super little fat.

I did that too and it took me about two years to rebuild my fat stores. During that time, that’s when my menstrual cycle was the hardest. I still have painful cycles but it was very hard. It took me a long time to build up those fat stores. I would say keep building up those fat stores and then for you, focus on tracking your cycle more. My partner and I, we are launching a calendar. It’s the Mystic Moon Calendar. If you keep an eye out on Rising Woman, we’re going to be launching that, but there’s also other ways for you to track your cycle daily and know where is that. Schedule more time for yourself to tune into your body and let it talk to you.

One of my practices is when I’m having a lot of pain, I go sit in the bath and put my hands on my womb and close my eyes and let my body tell me whatever it’s got to tell me. That is honestly a good practice to give your body the time and space to let messages come through, because oftentimes when we’re feeling a lot of PMS, we’re not slowing down enough to give ourselves the time that we need to be able to pay attention to whatever it is we need to focus on in our body or any messages, or if something is off in our life and we’re never taking the time to tune in and figure out where the alignment of, it can manifest in our body as discomfort.

When I was fourteen, fifteen, I used to go home from school. I usually get my period at school and just sit on a bath. That was good. I forgot about that.

There are many nice little things you can do to honor your cycle. Some of us have hard cycle, too. There are things you can do to make it better. Your PMS doesn’t have to be awful. At the same time, just remembering the thing about how a woman’s cycle is that it is up and down. There are fluctuations, and we’re not going to feel the same way every month. It’s something to tune into and to allow. As long as it doesn’t sound like you’re resisting it, it sounds like maybe there are a few things that you can pick back up again in order to give yourself that time. I was looking into the hormone testing and looking to ashwandaj, the herbs, and maybe chat with an herbalist if you want. I could post in the event after a name of an herbalist that I love, her name is Angela. That might be helpful for you as well, to get on a little bit of a regimen. In terms of order cycle, too, some women’s cycles are shorter, which is not always a bad thing.

It used to be longer. It used to be 29 days each time. Now, it’s shorter and stronger at the same time.

When did that start happening?

Less than a year. I could say something like maybe eight months now.

How old are you?

31.

You’re entering your thirties. There are some changes there. Our cycles do start to change with age. How long have you been with your partner?

Two years.

It didn’t start right when you met him?

We did have some major changes in our relationships status a couple of times. It could be related. I can look at it.

You’re going to have to tune in here and start to notice some patterns. A lot of the times, the cycles are responding to our environment. In the changes in relationship, are you feeling safe? Are you feeling secure? Are you feeling empowered? Are you feeling healthy? All of these things. Safety is a big one. If you’re feeling safe, then your cycle may ease off. If there’s anything in your life that feeling a little bit disruptive, your cycle could go wonky. For some women it will stop, for some women it will get painful or heavy. Some of it is medical stuff that I couldn’t help you with. The other stuff is like I’ve noticed in myself and in many other women that it’s related to our emotional circumstances and our environment. Maybe tuning into that more.

I think it’s emotional because I think my body is okay, more or less.

What you need to do is make yourself feel safe? What do you need to do to create safety for yourself and the feeling of security and stability, so you can start to balance out.

Another piece where safety is coming in and again where men can be an ally to women in terms of this is to provide that safe environment and also time and space to enable women to have this full expression. “During these two days, how do I take over the taking care of the kids or take over the dishes?” These little things that we can do, if you can ask for, then maybe you’re not asking for yet.

Do you live with your partner?

Not completely. We spend a lot of time together and he sleeps at my place most of the time.

There’s a little bit of a back and forth going on?

My dad lives next door and helps me with my daughter. I thought I can ask him a bit more as well.

Ask for support. How old is your daughter?

Twelve. There are changes happening for her as well now.

TL 055 | Woman’s Moon Cycle

Woman’s Moon Cycle: Moon Mysteries

It’s a big time. I work with a shaman and she wrote a book called Moon Mysteries. She’s local here. I’m going to post an article. Her name is Nikiah Seeds, and I’ve learned a lot from her. She does first moon parties for young girls, which are so social suite. It’s like an initiation and a little bit of rites of passage celebration for a girl’s first moon. She was featured in the New York Times or something for it.

I have been to one of those, but not hers.

Other questions we can help you? Any thoughts?

I’m grateful that you pointed to my fat intake. That might be a big thing.

One of the easiest things is start drinking bone broth. If you don’t like that, then make soup with it and use the bone broth as a base.

Thank you so much for being on the show.

Thank you.

The thing I liked most about what you’re talking about is it’s dark and it’s behind closed doors, but they’re simple things to make. This is a woman’s life. It’s 30 days of the month, which is every day you’re affected by this. For men, we just go. We’re like machines left and right. We get sick, we go down for a day or we break something, we stop for a second, but this is something that women have to deal with every single day. Just appreciating the power of it and also the lack of attention the world pays to it. There’s a lot of stuff around it, but it’s still not enough around it.

It’s all utilitarian. That’s like, “Here’s how to make it go away. Here’s how to feel it less, here’s how to cover that.” It’s not like, “Here’s how to honor it. Here’s how to allow it to be the time that you need to let go and to have an experience.” I love the part when you said, “This is a good time to go ask for a raise,” because I was thinking about that. I was like, “What would be the best time for me to pitch a client?” Any day, but for women, that special bag that empowers. I could see women and I can feel women, I can feel that my friends and my partner obviously, but women on the street. You could feel their power some days. You’re like, “What is that?” That’s probably in that timeframe, and to use this magical power inside of you to have your life more pleasurable and fuller.

There’s this video called Loving Your Lady Parts as a Path to Success, Power, and Global Change by Alyssa Vitti. She is amazing. This is how I first got started in the passion of the woman’s moon cycle is her. I suggest you go on YouTube and look up Alyssa Vitti TED Talk. I’ll try to post that in the event page as well, but it was great. She talks about that a lot, using your cycle as a tool for success, and that’s the way to do it for sure.

I appreciate you coming on. Thank you for the education that you gave us and also the people listening to the show. How do people find you? How do people work with you more?

I want to thank you for having me on. Thanks for the audience and a big shout out to my teachers and the women who I’ve learned from in this realm as well. They’ve made a huge impact. I wanted to tell you that first. You can find me at RisingWoman.com. We’re also on Facebook, @RisingWoman. The URL is Rising Woman Official. We’re also on Instagram @RisingWoman. If you’re interested in following my partner and I as we start to build our channel, we’re going to be traveling Asia and shooting relationship content over the next few months, we’re at Love and Truth. You can find that on Facebook for now and we’re launching LoveandTruth.tv. Those are the two areas you can find me.

You and your partner definitely are goofy, so I’m looking forward to watching that show.

The trick for me is going to be to catch him on video because he’s always funnier off-video sometimes.

Thank you so much for being on the show. I appreciate it.

Thank you, Robert and thanks, to everybody.

Thank you so much for being part of my life and part of the show. For more downloads, go to TuffLove.Live. I am revamping my website. I have now split up my consulting business and my Tuff Love, so new additions going to Tuff Love and a new way to look at podcasts. I’m working on my speaking career and writing, just taking my business to the next level because I want to and I’m going to. Go get some nookie. Have some fun. Have some mind-bending experiences. We will be with the kids being PG13. We’ll see it when the kids go to bed. That’s about it. Thank you so much. I love you. Go forth and face the day.

Thanks so much for joining us at Tuff Love. If you’d like to make a donation, please visit us at Paypal.Me/KandellConsulting. For more shows, please visit us at TuffLove.Live. Thanks so much. I love you. Go forth and face the day.

Resources mentioned:

About Sheleana Aiyana

TL 055 | Woman’s Moon CycleI’m Sheleana (‘Shay’ for short) and I’m the creator of Rising Woman.  This offering is the material manifestation of a vision I held for years. Rising Woman was born in 2015 after I completed a soul-shaking journey through divorce, and the woman you see next to me in the photo below was one of my guiding lights through it all.

As life would have it as I began to move out of the darkness, Heather began her journey into the deep. In the midst of her breakup, I fell in love with my partner Ben. Being in a Conscious Relationship has offered Ben and I an opportunity to “rise in love” and see one another in totality. Loving each other in the shadows has led us to a place where we can be completely ourselves and create a healing container together. Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined a love this potent; and we both credit our consistent work and training with our mutual teacher and therapist for the teachings we continue to receive.

Heather, Ben  and I are trained and certified in various breathwork techniques and as such, co-host breathwork ceremonies together multiple times per year. We are also Assistant Teachers in the 12 week Conscious Relationship Trainings with our teacher Phil Mistlberger.

I’m a trained Doula, having gone through multiple certification programs, including a full-spectrum training with midwife Molly Dutton-Kenney. My offerings in the realm of women’s fertility include 1-1 abortion & miscarriage postpartum support and completion ceremonies as well as pregnancy mentorship and couples sessions.

When Heather and I first met, our connection was instant. I still remember feeling this “bubble of love” emanate around us as we shared our hearts with one another and discussed some of the current women’s health issues we were facing.

In 2017, Heather and I formed a partnership that was truly inevitable. Heather is trained in various modalities including shadow work, sound-healing, breath-work and tantric practices. Together, we’re carrying this vision into expansion with the intention to create a safe space for women to reclaim their power, find their voice, and become responsible for their lives in an empowered, harmonious way.

Heather and I had been collaborating creatively and spiritually for some time, and we’re excited to finally have a dedicated place to share our hearts with you, musings and creative offerings with you.

We Co-Facilitate the Rising Woman Sisterhood; a local women’s group hosted in Vancouver, BC. You’ll find both of us very active in our online community which you’re invited to join here. As a commitment to our own path of healing and leadership development, we continue to apprentice under Transpersonal Therapist, Author and Workshop Facilitator, Phil Mistlberger.

If you’re interested in receiving personal support from either of us, you can learn about our offerings here.

Thank you for being a part of this community.

It’s our intention to remain humble and let spirit guide us along the way.

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